| Saturday, April 22, 2006 |
| ~ We've got to take it day by day ~ |
To my dear friends who have lost such dear people in such short time--and to everyone who is experiencing life's most difficult times. Someday soon all of us who have faith in Jesus Christ will be with Him in His Kingdom, and He will reign. There will be no more suffering just joy in forever dwelling with our King as His adult daughters and adult sons, His princesses and His princes--there's hope in the promise of ETERNAL life!
Day by Day Medley
(Swedish Melody/D. Wyrtzen)
as sung by Christine Wyrtzen
Day by day, and with each passing moment
Strength I find to meet my trials here
Trusting in my Father's wise bestowment
There's no cause for worry or for fear.
He, who's heart is kind beyond all measure
Gives unto each day what He sees best
And lovingly He gives with pain and pleasure
Mingling toil with peace and rest.
Sometimes the day seems long; our trials hard to bear
We're tempted to complain, murmur and despair
But Chrsit will soon apppear to catch His Bride away
All tears forever over in God's eternal day.
It will be worth it all when we see Jesus
Life's trials will seem so small when we see Christ
One glimpse of His dear face, all sorrow will erase
So bravely run the race till we see Christ.
But just think of stepping on shore and finding it heaven
Of touching a hand and finding it God's
Of breathing new air and finding it celestial
Of waking up in glory and finding it home.
This song comes from Christine's album "For Those Who Hurt"--my favorite (although I wish she had put "The Fire" on this album)
Go to https://www.daughtersofpromise.org/musicinterface/ to hear sound clips from this album and other Christine albums. Daughter of Promise has "The Fire" on it. |
sent to the stars at 1:07 PM   |
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| Thursday, April 20, 2006 |
| The Fire |
My testimony for the past year or so and especially the last week--
The Fire by D. Jackson Searles
sung by Christine Wyrtzen
I've been through a fire
That has deepened my desire
To know the living God more and more
It hasn't been much fun
But the work that it has done in my life
Has made it worth the hurt.
Sometimes we need the hard times
To bring us to our knees
Otherwise we'd do as we please and never hear Him.
He always knows what's best
And it's when we are distressed
That we really come to (know) (love) God
As He is.
I absolutely love everything Christine Wyrtzen sings. She has such a soothing gentle voice similar to Twila Paris , but Christine's music just touches a hurting transforming soul in a way no other can. As a little girl it was her soothing voice that would put me to sleep and as a young woman who's been through a lot, her music wonce again brings rest to my soul. She has a special gift from God to totally connect to the heart of a woman. Her music is timeless. I'm glad that in my grief I have re-dsiscovered her music. Learn more about Christine and her music and ministry at www.daughtersofpromise.org |
| sent to the stars at 9:58 PM |
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| Sunday, April 16, 2006 |
| Easter Hope |
My family has always celebrated eastern orthodox Easter more so then the one most of you are used to. My family is Greek. Greek Easter is next Sunday....however,
My sister and I went to our church today for Easter (today's Easter :) ). We went just the two of us. It was the first time I saw my sister since all this has happened. I was worried about today after how distant and cold she had sounded on the phone last night. But today was good.
Mark Schultz was our special guest at church today! I cried through every song.
This next part is especially for No Average Girl (she will know who this is about). My sweet dear friend who has gone away from Christ loves Mark Schultz. Even at times when he is not open to even me sharing Christ with him, he will listen to Mark Schultz. I remember just playing songs on the phone for him. A month or so ago I sent him a Mark Schultz album, and I do hope that he has been listening to it, especially now that he has been crushed by his grandpa's death. Oh how I wish he could have been in church with me today. I prayed for him through every song, just crying hoping that where he is that today on Easter he will be touched by the love of Christ. Afterwards I saw Mark Schultz. I briefly told him about my friend who has been in my life for almost 9 years now. Because there were quite a number of people lined up for his autograph and because it's easter and just like the rest of us he wants to sit down to easter dinner (i"m guessing he had dinner with my pastor and his family!), they said that he would not be able to do personal autographs. Well my precious friend ended up being an exception! Mark Schultz did a personal autograph just for him!! I can't wait to get this to him. He's going to be so touched. Pray that God will use this to soften his heart to the truth of the gospel.
For my friend (I know he won't be reading this, but this is from his favorite Mark Schultz song, which he did sing today)--
"When you come home,
No matter how far,
Run through the door
And into my arms
It's where you are loved,
It's where you belong
And I will be here
When you come home."
I really do hope he goes back home to his family, but more so than this I pray he comes back home to the loving arms of his Savior.
When we are still a great way off,
our Heavenly Father sees us.
Filled with compassion, He runs to us.
He embraces us and welcomes us home.
He says, "I WILL be a Father to you, and You will be My son."
--Luke 15:20; II Corinthians 6:18 |
| sent to the stars at 3:09 PM |
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| Saturday, April 15, 2006 |
| Heavenly Daddy, I need You |
After I learned that my sister (and her new husband) returned home tonight, I gave her a call. She seemed so cold :( I have never felt this distant from my sister in my life. It used to be that I was closer to no one more than my sister. This is the most heartbreaking thing I have ever faced in my life! And I've head some heartbreaking things to face (my father's death, watching friends I care about so much walk away from Christ, etc). I tried to share the hurt I felt for how she handled things....but she wasn't receptive to it. She just said in a cocky way that she eloped. She didn't have any desire to listen to any of my pain.....she just wanted to justify her actions. It hurts so much. She said that she still wanted to go to church tomorrow with me. I so don't want to go with her, but I fought the ever increasing desire to distance myself from her and told her I would go with her. Pray for me. This is the first time I will be seeing her since all this happened. I have so many different feelings inside---hurt, anger, confusion, fear (who is this person I thought was my sister?). I really don't want to go with her. And I surprised myself by gently saying I'd go and letting all the hurt tuck back inside me. If I never get to share my hurt with her, I think one day (I hope anyway) she will realize how her actions have hurt me, our mom and family as a whole.
I am a much more judgmental person than I realize. I can't believe how loving and merciful I can be to a best friend whose making poor choices, but how quick to condemnation and jugment I am with my sister. I guess it's so different with your family. Not that you love the non-family person any less, it's just different. And it's different for me because she isn't just my sister.....she really raised me. She is like a mom. You put your parent figures on a pedastal. Your mentors. And when they fall......well, you didn't prepare for that. And it's so heartbreaking.
Heavenly Daddy, I need You....
I need Your love to break through my hurt.
I need Your truth to speak to my confusion.
I need Your grace to help me be like You.
I need Your mercy to realize I make mistakes too.
I need Your hope to believe that there will be better days.
I need Your faith to guide me every step of the way.
And Heavenly Daddy, I need You to hold me. |
| sent to the stars at 7:59 PM |
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| Friday, April 14, 2006 |
| Squeaky Clean Sleep |
Well, I know people were praying that I'd be able to sleep last night. God found quite a unique way to calm my anxious heart.
I took a shower last night, then used the bathroom and I was then going to go to bed. Well, I flushed the toilet and it didn't go down, it came up! There was no overflow at that point. Just me trying to figure out how to fix this toilet. I didn't have a plunger, so I thought, hmmm maybe the toilet scrubber will have the same affect. Last night I learned that toilet scrubber is a toilet scrubber. That is it's role. This is the function it performs. That's it. I thought I'd wait for the water to settle down and then try flushing again. You know, maybe the scrubber did a little something. Maybe it took care of any blockage. Well like I said, I learned that a toilet scrubber scrubs, it doesn't plunge! The water overflowed into the entire bathroom!!! I then went off in search of a toilet plunger. I finally found one. I didn't have an instruction manual though. So I tried to figure out how this little gaget worked. After several attempts at working this mysterious gaget, the water went down and the toilet was fixed. But what a mess that was waiting for me! How do you get rid of half an inch of water covering the entire floor? That was my next adventure! I started mopping. But mopping that much water is like rowing a boat. The water was just going back and forth. Nothing was happening? Then believe it or not I started plunging the water! Maybe this thing works on a floor too!! Nope, don't try this at home! I eventually decided just to leave the fan on all night and hopefully by morning the water would be dried up. Well, I hopped in the shower, because by then I just felt icky from my icky situation. So went in for shower number 2!
This morning.....
This morning I spent four hours in the bathroom! The water had indeed dried. However, apparently some of the water that was around the toilet area had tiny pieces of shred up toilet paper mixed in it and it was now dried up and glued to the floor! What do you do???? I got a ton of disinfectent, hot water, and started mopping like crazy!! Then I waited for the floor to dry, while cleaning the toilet and the cleaning products! Then I vancummed the floor. Then I took a shower. Then I came out of the shower and the floor still looked bad. Off to round two of cleaning! Round two was followed by round three and round four and five! By then I need another shower!!! Yes, I took 4 showers within 10 hours.
I got my sleep and it was squeaky clean! |
| sent to the stars at 4:00 PM |
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| Thursday, April 13, 2006 |
| No sleep....but not out of His rest and care.... |
Last night I received the worst news I could have ever expected out of this situation with my sister. Yesterday morning she told my mom she was going for a ride, and she went and got married instead. My mom found out last night from my aunt, her sister-in-law. The only person she told was an aunt we don't even talk to all the time. Anyway, it's a very long complicated situation that I have not desired to mention in detail on this site. But in short, this is not a good thing. In other words, plead do not say congratulations. I'm heartbroken. This was my perfect sister who's never done anything wrong (well, we all do but she was as close to perfect as they come). She was the one who raised me. Who instilled all my morals in me. And now I don't even know who she is...
For whatever reason, God did not see it fit to grant me sleep last night. I had talk to two people. Felt better. Was starting to feel some peace. I played soothing music. I prayed. And I genuinely believed I would be able to sleep. I felt sleep near. But it didn't come to me all night. And now I have to go to work. And then a 3 hour class tonight and take a big quiz. I don't know how I'll get through that. I want to do well on my quiz. But by tonight I will be a zombie. Pray that God would grant me alertness and strength today to do well but then give me sleep tonight when I go to bed.
I can't even describe the brokenness I feel at this moment.
The eyes of God are upon me,
He sees everything I do
The arms of God are around me,
He keeps me safe and secure
And He knows where I am every hour of every day
He knows each thought I think,
He knows each word that I might say
And although there’ve been times I’ve been out of His will
I’ve never been out of His care
This changing world alarms me, with war – with strife – with sin,
But our loving Father charms me, with joy – with peace and with life
And He knows where I am every hour of every day
He knows each thought I think,
He knows each word that I might say
And although there’ve been times I’ve been out of His will,
I’ve never been out of His care
And although there’ve been times
I’ve been out of His will,
I’ve never….. been out… of….. His… care
("I've Never Been Out of His Care")
It's only your love that can carry the hurt. Can I ask you to carry me for a few painful miles? |
| sent to the stars at 6:26 AM |
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| Wednesday, April 12, 2006 |
| It is Well with My Soul |
It is Well with My Soul by Horatio G. Spafford
This hymn was written after two major traumas in Spafford’s life. The first was the great Chicago Fire of October 1871, which ruined him financially (he had been a wealthy businessman). Shortly after, while crossing the Atlantic, all four of Spafford’s daughters died in a collision with another ship. Spafford’s wife Anna survived and sent him the now famous telegram, “Saved alone.” Several weeks later, as Spafford’s own ship passed near the spot where his daughters died, the Holy Spirit inspired these words. They speak to the eternal hope that all believers have, no matter what pain and grief befall them on earth.
When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll; Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say, It is well, it is well, with my soul.
Refrain It is well, with my soul, It is well, with my soul, It is well, it is well, with my soul.
Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control, That Christ has regarded my helpless estate, And hath shed His own blood for my soul. Refrain
My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole, Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more, Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!
Refrain
For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live:
If Jordan above me shall roll, No pang shall be mine, for in death as in life Thou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.
Refrain
But, Lord, ‘tis for Thee, for Thy coming we wait,
The sky, not the grave, is our goal; Oh trump of the angel! Oh voice of the Lord! Blessèd hope, blessèd rest of my soul!
Refrain
And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll; The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend, Even so, it is well with my soul.
Refrain
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| sent to the stars at 6:23 AM |
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| Tuesday, April 11, 2006 |
| I will stand behind His Word... |
But if He chooses not to move in the way we prayed He would,
I'm confident He's working all together for my good.
And I will stand behind His word, for He is able.
This has been such an emotionally distressful weekend and early week for me. The quote from last post's song sums up what is happening with my sister now. It's all moving forward. It's set now. And I'm dealing with the pain of watching the woman who raised me and has always done everything right, make a decision that greatly disappoints me and breaks my heart. It is such a loss for me. A loss of a relationship that will be forever change. One that seems to be losing its closeness. I can't say more now....I've talked about it a lot today and I need to rest. I thank you for your prayers and hope you'll continue to remember me any my family in prayer.
At the same time I'm heartbroken for friends who are so dear to my heart losing such a dear man in their lives. My heart goes out to my sweet friend NoAverageGirl who has lost another grandpa in just a few weeks! And her entire family who's dear to my heart.....and to her cousin who is such a special friend to me. I feel so broken for all of them. Please pray for their family during this difficult time.
God bless each one reading this.
And thanks!
Star |
| sent to the stars at 8:22 PM |
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| Friday, April 07, 2006 |
| He Is Able |
He Is Able
Like peering through a window blurred with rain,
Emotions run together in a flood of doubt and pain. We've prayed as best we can, Now we must leave it in His hands.
Chorus:Yet, I know when my eyes fail to see, He is able, And even though it seems impossible to me, He is able. But if He chooses not to move in the way we prayed He would, I'm confident He's working all together for my good. And I will stand behind His word, for He is able.
Questions seem to haunt us night and day.
How could God allow my heart to be torn this way? Does He listen when I call? Is He even there at all?
Chorus:Yet, I know when my eyes fail to see, He is able,
And even though it seems impossible to me, He is able. But if He chooses not to move in the way we prayed He would, I'm confident He's working all together for my good. And I will stand behind His word, for He is able.
And as the night gives way to dawning and evaporates away,
I'll stand to face another day. And I will stand behind His word, for He is able, He is able, He is able!
Words by Jon Mohr.
Sound clips: |
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| Tuesday, April 04, 2006 |
| Thank you so much!!! |
Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and wonderful results.--James 5:16
I am completely overwhelmed by the response I got from my post concerning the situation with my sister. I am so encouraged by it. It's like God saying to me that He has heard every single prayer and seen every single tear. And reminding me that He has been on this since before it ever started. To see responses from 16 people when until now I've only had one faithful reader of my blog and one visitor (that I know of). I really do believe God wanted to make it clear to me that He is here and He is working.
I no matter what happens, even if nothing changes, He is in control. His timing is not my timing, and His ways are not my ways. He does convict and move in people's hearts, something I can't do no matter how hard I try, but He does still give free will. No matter what He will see me through and see my family through.
My prayer is that I will not for a second lose faith, no matter how dark things may become...knowing He doesn't promise to change our circumstances but He will change us if we let Him.
Thank you so much!!! I can't wait to visit each of your blogs really soon. Your prayers mean more to me than I could ever express into words. Come back and visit any time!
May God bless each one of you.
With deepest gratitude and appreciation,
Star
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| sent to the stars at 9:58 PM |
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| Saturday, April 01, 2006 |
| Against All Hope |
“Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed…”—Romans 4:18.
I love this verse in the Message paraphrase:
“When everything was hopeless, Abraham believed anyway, deciding not to live on the basis of what he saw he couldn’t do but on what God said he would do.”
And this is what we must do. When everything is hopeless, we must believe anyway and make a conscious decision to live not on the basis of what we can see neither we nor any man can do but on what God says He can and will do. With God, ALL things are possible. Not some. Not most. ALL!
Tonight, right now, it is my prayer that God would help me to fully believe these words and help me to do this. I am so devestated. I've been praying for something not to happen for so long now in regards to my family. I truly believe with all my heart that my sister is about to go through with the worst decision ever that will destroy her life. If you have a sister who you are closer with than with any other person on this earth, then maybe you could understand how I feel right now when I've already lost some of that special closeness because of choices that I truly believe are not according to God's Word.
I'm so broken. I kept holding on to the verse that says that a man will make many plans in his heart but only the Lord's purpose will prevail. I kept praying that God would reveal what was hidden and expose the truth that anything not of Him would be revealed for what it is. But against all hope, Abraham in hope believed. And against all hope, Star in hope must believe. I must make a conscious decision to keep trusting in the One who is in control. I am not in control. I cannot change these things. And though they break me, He will heal me. He will restore me. He will continue to work in my life, if I continue to cling to Him. I know that God works all things together for good.....and I must not lose hope. I must not give up.
Please keep me in your prayers if you are reading this. And keep my family in my prayers. And please pray that my sister would see God's will and purposes for her life. That God would reveal to her any choice that is not pleasing to Him.
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| sent to the stars at 9:38 PM |
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| Where To? |
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| View My Profile |
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| Favorite Books |
- The Papa Prayer
- The Power of a Praying Woman
- Streams in the Desert
- A Walk to Remember
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